Triple Threats 30+, TTC#1 w/ loss(es) - January 2011

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Purple77 replied on 01-30-2011 8:21 AM | Locked

Sarah--PrayPrayPray that this is a sticky pg!  Congrats on your BFP.  I can only imagine the nerves you will have until Wed...thinking of you. Baby Dust

lala--Really sorry about the SA results.  That must be really disappointing.  How is DH taking it?  Good luck to him with the retest.  Yeah, I think we all had this illusion that we'd be pg within a few months of ditching birth control. ROFL  Hilarious.  I still can't believe I'm dealing with this sometimes...What kind of zinc supplement are you taking?  Is it something you can just buy in any store or is it a special one?  I didn't realize you were in Oregon.  Cool!

Ramona--I think Thurs testing sounds good.  12 dpo is solid and should give you something if you're pg. Fingers Crossed  I did manage to work a full day on Fri, even after a random awful night of insomnia on Thurs night.  No idea where that came from.

Steph--that must have been devastating to have a missed m/c.  I remember all of the details of my m/c diagnosis so clearly, too...at 7 weeks they gave me my 8 week u/s because I'd had some spotting, and the PA said "This doesn't look like where it should be."  I chose to think that she meant it had implanted in an iffy spot and I'd have placenta previa or something, but when she brought in the doc, the doc said it hadn't grown since 5.5 weeks.  It was an empty sac.  I wish I'd had my D&C immediately.  I waited a month to m/c naturally (worst month ever) until I finally had a D&C at 11 weeks.

I hope they will do a workup on you just to eliminate the "what if" factor....just seems like it could really help give you peace of mind.  I'm sure it could just be horrible luck but it would help to know for sure.

Yes, TTC#1 is really, really tough and different from m/cs that happen after a woman has kids.  My SIL had a chemical last summer and tried to equate it with my loss earlier in the year.  She'd previously had 3 uneventful pregnancies & births (in something like 4 years), gotten pg with those in about 3 months each...yeah, it's not the same thing as what I went through TTC#1.  Of course, she got pg shortly after her chemical with a sticky pg--must be nice!  Oh, and she's one of those people who tells the whole world about the pg very early on, and it's totally cool because they're (usually) sticky.

Funny that you're from MA, too--we have so many MA ladies!  You guys have had the worst winter ever, or best, if you love snow.  We've had a lot of snow for us, but of course, nothing like your blizzards.

Susannah--have you decided when you'll test?

AFM--Slept in this morning, ahh.  Feeling a ton better this weekend.  Walked a lot (still kinda slowly) yesterday and did a lot of cooking.  I think it did make me more sore under my incisions but not horribly so.  Think I'm almost ready to walk with my neighbors again.  I'm at the point where sometimes I forget that I had surgery and I'll reach for something and suddenly remember that I still have to be careful with my movements.  My appetite is finally back, hooray.  Once I started eating normally again on Friday, my energy level improved so much.

I'm going to write a thank-you email to endo doc.  I was so out of it at my post-op and I may never see him again, and I don't want to wait to thank him until I'm pg or I have a pain-free period or something--I appreciate what he's done, regardless of what happens next.  He's the most accessible, patient, knowledgeable doc I've known, esp compared to my RE and OB/gyns.  I have a tiny crush on him (he's only in his late 30's) so I don't want to gush too much in the email...gonna have to keep it toned down. Laugh

Holly

Me-34, DH-40
TTC since August '09
Angel  2/9/10, dx at 7 weeks (blighted ovum)
TTCA for 9 cycles from 4/10-12/10, no BFPs.
Bloodwork, HSG, & SA were normal (tested in fall '10). 
Stage II endo was excised via laparoscopy on 1/19/11.
Started TTC again in 3/11, 5 cycles all BFNs
July 2011:  1st IUI + letrozole (IUI cancelled) = BFP
Angel 9/9/11, dx at 7 weeks
Currently TTA until we find out more info

 
If you're 30+, TTC#1 after loss(es), come drop by the Triple Threats for some tea & sympathy (over here...)

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Purple77 replied on 01-30-2011 8:24 AM | Locked

Ooh, good idea about the extra beta, Ramona

Me-34, DH-40
TTC since August '09
Angel  2/9/10, dx at 7 weeks (blighted ovum)
TTCA for 9 cycles from 4/10-12/10, no BFPs.
Bloodwork, HSG, & SA were normal (tested in fall '10). 
Stage II endo was excised via laparoscopy on 1/19/11.
Started TTC again in 3/11, 5 cycles all BFNs
July 2011:  1st IUI + letrozole (IUI cancelled) = BFP
Angel 9/9/11, dx at 7 weeks
Currently TTA until we find out more info

 
If you're 30+, TTC#1 after loss(es), come drop by the Triple Threats for some tea & sympathy (over here...)

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rebeccas replied on 01-30-2011 11:26 AM | Locked

Ramona - Your sweet potato home fries post on FB made me drool. How are you feeling? Is the prometrium still okay? I will anxiously await your testing results later this week!

lala - I think I read somewhere you need to take zinc in combo with copper for it to be absorbed. Your multi vit has copper, right? I am so sorry about DH’s results. But, there are lots of supplements that help with sperm! Dig around on the site and I’m sure you’ll get lots of suggestions. Did you ever tell us your name? I can’t seem to recall.

Sarah - congrats again. I agree with the suggestion to get an earlier beta. More info might be better! I’m jealous of your hot hair. I hate mine!

Holly - We are up to 3 snow days so far. If we get to 5, we will have to make up days. Reports are all done but I am behind on correcting. I didn’t end up doing any work on the snow day. I am so lazy! :) LOL about the buzzed reading. Been there! I’m hoping you don’t need an IUI or IVF and that the endo will be the end of it. Crossing fingers and toes for you.

Susannah - I hear ya on wanting a break from TTC. I am actually battling with myself a bit about charting this month. My RE said it is “antiquated” and I could stop if I want to. But, part of me is curious what the Met will do to my temps, if anything. I could reply on OPKs and then temp, but I just can’t decide. What CD are you on?

Steph - Welcome to this group! These women are so fabulous and supportive. I’m sorry you are here but glad to have you. I am so sorry for your losses. I am in Belmont. What town in MA are you in? I also get completely pissed off when I watch TV with pregnancy stories. Right now, one of my favorites, “How I Met Your Mother,” has a fertility storyline and as much as I love the show, it has been painful. I hope your doc will do some testing for you.


AFM - I started the Metformin a few days ago, and so far so good. DH has his SA on Tuesday, and I have my HSG on Thursday. We got back my blood work and I am a little confused. Everything was normal (which is good) but the insulin resistance test was negative too, which is confusing. The RE said the blood work may or may not confirm the PCOS and either way, we are going forward with the Metformin. But now I don’t know whether to be excited about the Met or not. Well, AF is almost gone and I have been exercising more. Hopefully that will mean I end up ovulating this cycle.

P.S. We were so frustrated yesterday. The couch we bought wouldn’t fit up our stairs! I loved that couch! We had to run back to the store and find a new one. We were VERY limited in what we could choose because of that stupid stairwell. So we chose a 4 piece sectional that is SURE to fit, but it was more $$ than we wanted to spend. <sigh> Oh well...hopefully it will last for many years to come.

I am also going to post a letter I wrote to my old OB, at my therapist's suggestion. I may never send it but it felt good to write it.

Have a good Sunday!


Cycle 1-3 here: http://tcoyf.com/members/rebeccas/pccharts/3.aspx

Current charts: http://tcoyf.com/members/rebeccas/charts/default.aspx

Rebecca: 32 years oldBig Smile DH: 34 years oldLaugh

TTC #1 since Jan. 2010 after 15 years on BCP. One Angel, and PCOS.

Lots of unmedicated cycles, 2 Clomid cycles, 2 Gonal-F/Ovidrel/IUI cycles = BFN. Onto IVF in 2012.
January 2012 - 23 eggs retrieved, 19 mature, none fertilize.

April 2012: IVF#2: with ICSI. 26 retrieved, 20 fert, 5dt, BFP! Chick 6 in the freezer.

The Nugget is due New Year's Day, 2013! Baby Boy

A perfect Christmas gift: Max David arrived 12/25/12!Baby Boy

Full timeline in my bio Smile

My blog: http://waitingforlittlefeet.blogspot.com/

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rebeccas replied on 01-30-2011 11:34 AM | Locked

Dear Dr. ________,

I hope you will take this letter in the spirit in which it is written. As a teacher, I often have other educators watch my lessons and provide feedback on my technique and content, to help me improve my craft. The information in this letter is meant to be helpful to you, so that you may serve your patients better in the future.

When I began trying to conceive in January 2010, I had no idea how rocky that road would be for me. As a 30 year old woman in good health, I had no reason to expect that I would have difficulty becoming pregnant. After 15 years on birth control, I knew patience might be needed, but I was surprised at the other events that followed. As you know, I had very long and irregular cycles, but they were always ovulatory. In July, I got pregnant but I had a missed miscarriage at 6 weeks. I had a first D&C, followed by 8 weeks of spotting, leading to an ultrasound that showed retained tissue, then a hysteroscopy, and second D&C. Both times, you and the hospital staff were kind and supportive to me. But, I also received some treatment from your nurse practitioner that made my experience more painful, and spoke to you about it. You were very caring and I really felt like you took my concerns seriously. For that, I thank you.

After my second D&C in late August, I became anovulatory and had to induce a period with Provera the first week of November. After that, I still had no ovulation. I called you in late November and informed you that I had still not ovulated (no ovulation since I became pregnant in July) and that I suspected I might be dealing with PCOS. I reminded you of my family history (sister with PCOS and hypothyroid, mother with hyporthyroid and ovarian cysts, paternal diabetes, etc.) and relayed several symptoms that I thought might be related. I requested new blood work for my hormone levels, since they had not been checked since the previous spring, and insulin resistance testing. At that time, you would not order any further blood testing (except a fasting blood sugar) and dismissed my concerns about PCOS. You offered me Clomid and ended the conversation without any suggestion of a plan to figure out why I was not cycling normally. The idea of seeing a reproductive endocrinologist was also never offered. Due to the risks and side effects of Clomid, I did not ask for the perscription. I wanted to know the cause of my anovulation and I knew inducing ovulation with Clomid would not provide those answers.

In January, I decided to seek out a specialist and see if they had any insight into my anovulation. I saw Jan Shifren, M.D. an RE that practices out of MGH and Newton-Wellesley Hospital. In our first appointment, where she spent ample time with my husband and I,  she confirmed my suspicion that I do in fact have PCOS. She then ordered all of the testing necessary and performed a vaginal ultrasound in her office. She said as soon as she looked at my ovaries that they were poly cystic. I asked her why I had never been told this, despite having three ultrasounds during my pregnancy and after my miscarriage, and she could not give a reason. Needless to say, I was shocked. I know it is possible that these cysts developed since August, but I will always have some doubt in my mind. Soon, I will begin Metformin to treat the PCOS and hopefully my cycles will begin to normalize. She also ordered an HSG for me and a semen analysis for my husband. She felt strongly that we should complete all possible testing to have an informed and logical plan.

When I was diagnosed by Dr. Shifren and we created this plan of action, I was both happy about having answers and upset that my initial concerns had been ignored. I, as many women do, count on their OB/Gyn to be a reliable source of insight into my health. If I had not been well read on the subject and proactive about seeking a specialist’s insight, I might have delayed my efforts to have a baby for months or longer. I realize that you have many patients and that it must feel uncomfortable for you to have patients call and try to self-diagnose. However, in my case, my concerns were accurate. I wish I felt as though you had considered my ideas, but I do not feel that way. Instead, I feel disappointed about my experience.

As I said, I hope this letter will help with the care of other patients in your practice. I am sure that most patients at the Center for Women have a more positive experience that I did. If my case helps even one other patient get the consideration they deserve, then I guess this letter served its purpose.

Best of luck in the future.



Cycle 1-3 here: http://tcoyf.com/members/rebeccas/pccharts/3.aspx

Current charts: http://tcoyf.com/members/rebeccas/charts/default.aspx

Rebecca: 32 years oldBig Smile DH: 34 years oldLaugh

TTC #1 since Jan. 2010 after 15 years on BCP. One Angel, and PCOS.

Lots of unmedicated cycles, 2 Clomid cycles, 2 Gonal-F/Ovidrel/IUI cycles = BFN. Onto IVF in 2012.
January 2012 - 23 eggs retrieved, 19 mature, none fertilize.

April 2012: IVF#2: with ICSI. 26 retrieved, 20 fert, 5dt, BFP! Chick 6 in the freezer.

The Nugget is due New Year's Day, 2013! Baby Boy

A perfect Christmas gift: Max David arrived 12/25/12!Baby Boy

Full timeline in my bio Smile

My blog: http://waitingforlittlefeet.blogspot.com/

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Posts 764
sblake001 replied on 01-30-2011 11:48 AM | Locked

Rebecca - I think the letter is perfect!  I think you should really send it to her.

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Purple77 replied on 01-30-2011 12:52 PM | Locked

Rebecca, your letter is really good.  You're a good writer and you wrote in a "here are the facts" kinda way, not an accusatory/angry way. 

I'm pretty amazed that you're only up to 3 snow days with all of the massive snows you've had.  As for your test results, hadn't the RE said that you were borderline PCOS, anyway?  Could that be why your tests turned out normal?  I still think there's plenty of reason to be optimistic with the metformin.  It seems like it's helped so many people on these forums.

That is so frustrating about your couch!!  Sorry you had to buy a different one.

AFM--it's 60* and sunny here!  Don't hate me for it.  ETA:  OMG, it's actually 66*.   We just had a picnic in a really nice spot w/ French Fry.  I'm gonna try to do as much sitting as possible the rest of the day--definitely more sore in my abs after all the activity yesterday.

Me-34, DH-40
TTC since August '09
Angel  2/9/10, dx at 7 weeks (blighted ovum)
TTCA for 9 cycles from 4/10-12/10, no BFPs.
Bloodwork, HSG, & SA were normal (tested in fall '10). 
Stage II endo was excised via laparoscopy on 1/19/11.
Started TTC again in 3/11, 5 cycles all BFNs
July 2011:  1st IUI + letrozole (IUI cancelled) = BFP
Angel 9/9/11, dx at 7 weeks
Currently TTA until we find out more info

 
If you're 30+, TTC#1 after loss(es), come drop by the Triple Threats for some tea & sympathy (over here...)

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SBR26.2 replied on 01-30-2011 1:54 PM | Locked

lala - Sorry to hear about the SA results.  Hope the results are better this next time around.  Is this the first one that DH has done?  I looked up some stuff about zinc deficiency, pretty interesting.  I checked my multivitamin to make sure that it had zinc in it.  I have Vit D deficiency which my RE says is related to TTC as well, so I take 5x the recommended amount every day. 

Holly - glad you are feeling a lot better and back to eating normally again.  I think a thank-you note to your endo doctor sounds nice.  I'm sure his office and he would appreciate it. 
I am jealous of your warm temps!  Yesterday it got above freezing here and I thought that was warm. 

Rebecca - sorry about your couch!  That really stinks that the first one wouldn't fit up the stairs and you had to get a different one.  Did you start out with a full does on the Met, or are you building up to a final amount?  I really like your letter to your old OB.  I think its very informative and not angry or spiteful at all.  If you decide to send it, I think it would get your point across very well.

AFM - 8 dpo.  My temps have been down a little bit the last two days, so I'm not quite sure what to think about that.  Today I've felt like AF is starting.  Been having some cramps and my gallbladder is a bit sore today.  That always happens 2-3 days before AF.  Plus the wetness from the progesterone suppositories isn't helping!  I know its probably too early for AF to show, but all of these things are playing tricks on me.   I am going to try my best to wait until Thursday, hopefully I can make it.

Work is going to be challenging this week.  Supposedly they are going to make some big announcement tomorrow so the rumors have been flying.  Everyone is thinking reorg, but we'll see.  Hopefully it doesn't mean me or DH is out of a job. 

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ellisrena replied on 01-30-2011 3:47 PM | Locked

Sarah- Congratulations!  I so hope that this pregnancy goes to term without complication and results in a beautiful baby for you.

Rebecca- I think your letter was great and I agree that you should send it.  The only thing I would change is to take out "I guess" at the end.  It is so articulate and elegantly put, don't apologize for yourself at the end.  Everything you say is completely true.

Holly- Glad you are up and around, eating, and just generally doing well.  I'm jealous of your picnic.  We won't be doing any of that in our neck of the woods for a while.

Lala- Sorry to hear about the less than ideal SA.  Hopefully he just had a bad day.  I think that is pretty common. 

Ramona- That would be awful to have to worry about losing your job on top of everything else.  I hope the announcement is something positive.  I am 8 dpo too and I can't tell what to think.  This is my first time on the progesterone so my body feels totally alien to me right now but who knows what it's from.

Steph- Welcome to the group!  I have gotten a ton of great support here and I know you will as well.  It's awesome to talk to people who understand exactly what you are going through and who need to vent about the same kinds of crazy stuff.

AFM- I haven't decided when to test.  My beta is scheduled for Saturday.  I want to call and ask if I will get the results on Saturday or if I'll have to wait until Monday because of the weekend.  But I don't want to sound like an obsessed lunatic, even though that's what I am.  I don't think I will be able to go without testing all week but I can't decide when is a good time either.  I have to go back to the dermatologist Tuesday to see if anything else needs to be biopsied so I was thinking maybe I'll test Wednesday.  I don't want to test Tuesday and then have to deal with potential cancer stuff on top of whatever I find out. 

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sblake001 replied on 01-31-2011 9:18 AM | Locked

Holly - It sounds like you are definitely on the mend.  Is the warmer weather continuing today?  BTW, love the name of your dog...French Fry, so cute.  What type of dog is it?  I have two malteses, Dolly and Dave (the latter is named after Dave Matthews).

Lala - Sorry you are down about the SA, but keep your spirits up, it sounds like everything was not bad news.  At least the count and morphology was normal.  Fingers Crossed that this week's test yields better results.

Ramona - I decided against asking for an extra beta, I just want to hold out until  Wednesday now.  I'm really busy at work this week so I think these two days will fly by, at least I hope they will.  Have you gotten the big announcement yet today?  I hope it isn't bad news.  I think you should test on Wednesday with Susannah.  I'm really hopeful for you this cycle.

Rebecca - So are  you all just going to try on your own for a couple months before making the decision about moving onto Clomid?  How is your CM normally?  Are you supposed to see immediate results from the Met, or does it take a couple months?

Susannah - I would vote to test on Wednesday.  You'll be 11DPO at that point, I think that's a reasonable waiting time.  And you said during your last pregnancy you got a positive pretty early, right?  Your temps are looking great, my Fingers Crossed for you.  If you and DH take next month off, will you start up again with an IUI + injectables again the following month?  I hope it doesn't even get to that though.  I would think they would call you back about the beta results on Saturday.  At my RE they have monitoriting in the morning and then always call you back between 1-4pm the same day.

Steph - I'm so sorry about the missed m/c and the chemical.  Are you seeing an RE at this point, or are you still with your regular OB/GYN?  Did they suggest you take some time off, or are you all clear to try again next month?

AFM - Still just hanging, trying not to get my hopes up.  DH left for a work trip in Puerto Rico this morning, I'm so frigging jealous, so it's me taking care of the dogs by myself while working until probably 9pm each night this week.  Luckily I live like 1.5 miles from my office so I can pretty easily slip home to let them out, but still...so I have lots of distractions this week.  Hope to hear some good news from some of your later this week!

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teresamoore replied on 01-31-2011 10:03 AM | Locked

Sarah, Congrats!  May this be a sticky one!  Maybe you'll kick off a wave of BFP's for Susannah and Ramona!

Steph, hugs, this is a great group of women.  May you find comfort and support here on your journey to having a Take-Home Baby.

Lala, actually, the SA is not all bad news:  morphology was good, and that's the hardest one to correct.  The others can be influenced by various factors.  My DH was on Proxeed (expensive, but not as bad as most fertility treatments) for a while, it's good stuff. 

Love to the rest of you wonderful women.

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jenno replied on 01-31-2011 10:23 AM | Locked

Sarah- Thanks for the welcome! Big congrats and good luck on Wednesday! I recently ordered some IC's and they are just the best. So cheap, so no guilt to just pee and dip away. I'm still seeing a regular OB/GYN, and I'm waiting to see if they will agree to doing some testing. I'm not really sure about waiting, I was dealing with the nurse for my quants, she is the one who is supposed to talk to my Dr about a possible workup. I haven't gotten a straight answer on if they want me to wait or not, at the time when I spoke to her, I hadn't started bleeding yet. I started the next day, and am now in full (normal) AF, so I don't really see why waiting would be necessary. Although it seemed like SO much longer, I was actually only pregnant for a week, from positive test to negative test, so it seems like moving on should be ok. After my D&C last time, they told me to wait for 1 normal period, then try again, so I would think the same this time. I'm wondering what others' experience has been though?

SBR26.2-Thank you for the welcome as well! I'm glad that your Dr went ahead with RPL testing, that is wonderful. Was there anything you said or did that got things moving? I still haven't heard back from my office to see if they will let me have it done. If I don't hear today I'll be harassing tomorrow. Even if they don't want to do everything there is, just starting with blood tests seems like it can't be too difficult!

Lala-I thought the same thing, after years of worrying about getting pregnant, who knew it isn't as easy as one unprotected BD! I have the same situation, either friends who aren't in the right place yet, already have kids that came with ease, or I have some that have had fertility issues, but they have managed to have one baby. I don't know anybody IRL that is struggling with no success. I hope that DH's semen analysis improve, I think there can be a lot of variation sometimes?

Holly-Oh so sad, it is amazing how details stick! I kept trying to convince myself that the tech wasn't saying anything since this wasn't my first U/S, and it was for the screening test, not a general U/S. I even tried to think that perhaps it was a different sort of ultrasound instrument, that might not show heartbeats in detail (yeah that make a ton of sense...lol). I have a vet I have a tiny crush on...it is amazing how really super docs can make such an impression! I'm glad you are feeling better!

Rebecca-Thank you for the welcome! I'm in Easthampton, out by Amherst. I love your letter, I kind of think you should send it! It is written very well, in no way offensive, and is filled with facts. I hate to hear what you have gone through, but it sounds like your new Dr is really on the right path!

Ellisrena-Thanks for the welcome. Good luck when you decide to test!

Theresamoore-Thanks so much!

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Purple77 replied on 01-31-2011 1:16 PM | Locked

Owww.  Definitely overdid it this weekend and really uncomfortable now.  Even thinking about leaving work early so that I can go lie down.  Sitting up is really uncomfortable.  Take-out or DH cooking is definitely in order tonight.

Ramona--what's the news on the work announcement?  I hope it's nothing bad.  Seems like your down temps could be the ~7dpo estrogen surge but I'm no expert.  Good luck making it 'til Thurs--it's so hard.

Susannah--GL with testing Wed.  I think it sounds good not to test before your derm appt.  Sending healthy mole vibes your way for Tues.

Sarah--what a bad time for you DH to go out of town!  I'm glad you have lots of busyness this week at work, at least.  My doggie is a 12-year-old Sheltie mix, emphasis on the "mix."  She has no Sheltie herding abilities or stamina, but her fluffiness resembles a Sheltie.  Your little Maltese in your pic is adorable. 

Steph--seems like there are so many opinions about whether to wait a cycle (or 2) after a m/c or to start TTCing right away.  My doc had me wait 2 cycles, which seemed like forever.  I bet the advice differs depending on how far along the pregnancy was.  It just sucks--I can totally see how experiencing your pregnancy for 1 week must have seemed like much longer.  I only knew I was pg for just over 3 weeks before getting the m/c dx, and it seemed like forever.

I can totally see how you would have hoped that the u/s equipment might not show heartbeats--I guess we'll think anything that will give us hope.  For my horrendous u/s, my DH wasn't even there.  I hadn't expected to get an u/s that day so we hadn't thought he'd needed to come!  I hope your DH was there for you at the time.

I think that they should do RPL testing on you if that's what you want.  If they won't, you could try an RE.  I'd guess they wouldn't have a problem doing the tests.  I hope you hear something soon!

 

 

Me-34, DH-40
TTC since August '09
Angel  2/9/10, dx at 7 weeks (blighted ovum)
TTCA for 9 cycles from 4/10-12/10, no BFPs.
Bloodwork, HSG, & SA were normal (tested in fall '10). 
Stage II endo was excised via laparoscopy on 1/19/11.
Started TTC again in 3/11, 5 cycles all BFNs
July 2011:  1st IUI + letrozole (IUI cancelled) = BFP
Angel 9/9/11, dx at 7 weeks
Currently TTA until we find out more info

 
If you're 30+, TTC#1 after loss(es), come drop by the Triple Threats for some tea & sympathy (over here...)

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jenno replied on 01-31-2011 1:37 PM | Locked

Hi-So funny you just responded, I just came on here with a serious vent.  I am just a mess right now and in tears.

The nurse called me back, she said she spoke with my Dr who said she doesn't want me to come in, and would order no testing of any sort at this point.  Since this was "just" a chemical pregnancy, she wants me to try (and potentially go through this) for a 3rd time before exploring anything.  She also said that is is "very" important that I wait a few cycles before trying again.  This is in direct conflict to her recommendation the first time which was wait for 1 period to try again.

How can it be "just" a chemical pregnancy on one hand, but then require waiting several cycles on the other?  I don't understand and was too stunned to be effective on the phone.

I am just lost and so upset right now, I don't understand the need to go through this a 3rd time, and with no explanation of why to wait now vs. not last time, I don't know what to believe or do.  I did call and leave a message with the dr I used to go to before getting pregnant the first time.  Hopefully they will call me back soon, but I feel like a lunatic even doing that!

 

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Purple77 replied on 01-31-2011 1:48 PM | Locked

Steph--I'm so sorry you had such an upsetting call. Sad I think it's really concerning that your doc is changing her recommendation for how many cycles to wait, esp knowing that this was an earlier loss and would warrant waiting less time than your previous loss, not more, IMO.  Don't worry about feeling like a lunatic for calling your other doc.  We've all felt like that at times....it's so important that you feel comfortable with your care, though, and this doc clearly isn't making you feel that way.  Did she really say "just" a chemical pg?  Seriously, she needs some sensitivity training.  Maybe you should switch docs.  Good luck getting info from your old doc.

Me-34, DH-40
TTC since August '09
Angel  2/9/10, dx at 7 weeks (blighted ovum)
TTCA for 9 cycles from 4/10-12/10, no BFPs.
Bloodwork, HSG, & SA were normal (tested in fall '10). 
Stage II endo was excised via laparoscopy on 1/19/11.
Started TTC again in 3/11, 5 cycles all BFNs
July 2011:  1st IUI + letrozole (IUI cancelled) = BFP
Angel 9/9/11, dx at 7 weeks
Currently TTA until we find out more info

 
If you're 30+, TTC#1 after loss(es), come drop by the Triple Threats for some tea & sympathy (over here...)

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Posts 764
sblake001 replied on 01-31-2011 2:09 PM | Locked

Steph,

I agree with Holly.  That makes no sense to wait more time after a chemical then after a later loss.  I definitely think you should insist on talking to the doctor directly.  I've found that Dr.'s in general definitely think of chemcial pregnancies different than regular miscarriages.  I don't personally agree with that philosophy and if I had listened to them and not pushed for the ureaplasma testing, I'm still not sure I would have found out about that yet.  PS - You are NOT a lunatic.

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jenno replied on 01-31-2011 3:04 PM | Locked

Hi Holly and Sarah-Thank you so much for your responses.  The old doc's office did call back, were very nice but it was very strained as I'm not really a patient there anymore.  I had changed not because of anything they did, but because they only service one hospital, and it is easier for me to go to a different one, so I had to find an office that serves that hospital.  Basically they said I can make an appt for a yearly exam and discuss it then...but not sure if this would really work as I just had a yearly done at the new office.  It was very weird.

Anyway, so I called my current office back and left a message for the Dr to call me directly.  I'm planning on asking two things, one is why are they recommending waiting longer this time for the "just" chemical (yes, the nurse did say that!!!).  Two, if they want me to wait anyway, can't I have some testing done in the meantime?  I don't understand their hesitation, is it insurance?  If it isn't somehow $$-related, then what is the possible downside of testing?

I'm currently 32, and will be 33 in July.  While I know this is young in the scheme of things when you starting thinking about months of watiing after m/c, months trying to get pregnant, months for potential testing...it all really adds up, especially considering the potential for another miscarriage!  I am an only child, and my aunt (her sister) went through multiple m/c and an ectopic pregnancy before settling in IVF to have her only child.  I certainly do not come from an especially fertile family.  I now already have 2 m/c under my belt in a short period of time, so I guess I am just going to have to be blunt about my concerns here and see where it gets me.

Thank you all for listening to my venting, I guess to get my mind going before doc calls...do you have any thoughts?  Am I overreacting?  Is there something you would be more direct about requesting?     

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Purple77 replied on 01-31-2011 3:17 PM | Locked

Steph--I have really limited experience with this so I'm not a huge help.  All I know is that Ramona was able to get RPL testing after 2 losses (Sarah, was that what happened with you, too?) so I didn't think it was a big deal for them to do it.  Not sure about the insurance coverage for it.  I hope that the doc can shed some light on what she's thinking.  Good luck with the call!

I know what you mean about your age.  I'll be 34 in March.  It feels like time is slipping away very quickly, and my DH shares none of my age concerns.  He seems to think we have forever!  I guess we have to keep in mind that it "only" takes one sticky pg (plus 9 months) for us to have our first THBs.

Me-34, DH-40
TTC since August '09
Angel  2/9/10, dx at 7 weeks (blighted ovum)
TTCA for 9 cycles from 4/10-12/10, no BFPs.
Bloodwork, HSG, & SA were normal (tested in fall '10). 
Stage II endo was excised via laparoscopy on 1/19/11.
Started TTC again in 3/11, 5 cycles all BFNs
July 2011:  1st IUI + letrozole (IUI cancelled) = BFP
Angel 9/9/11, dx at 7 weeks
Currently TTA until we find out more info

 
If you're 30+, TTC#1 after loss(es), come drop by the Triple Threats for some tea & sympathy (over here...)

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teresamoore replied on 01-31-2011 3:22 PM | Locked

Steph, hugs.  Many doctors don't even ask you to wait at all for "just" (BOO!) a chemical.  Given your own history of loss and your family history of low fertility, I would really push for some testing, even though you haven't lost three babies yet.  You are not overreacting.  As for specific testing, how are your charts?  Do you ovulate regularly, in a reasonable time frame?  Do you have a decent luteal phase?  If yes both of those, then I'd start with the blood tests.  There are various autoimmune markers to look for as well as other stuff like thyroid issues and common infections (like the ureaplasma.)  There may be a writeup somewhere in the forums here (I don't hang out much anywhere except here since ovusoft imploded the second time around), but here is another one:  http://www.fertilityplus.org/faq/miscarriage/rpl.html.  Good luck!

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sblake001 replied on 01-31-2011 3:25 PM | Locked

I was able to get some testing done with my regular OBGYN.  Most of the bloodwork was covered (until I moved onto an RE at which point, everything is out of pocket).  My HSG and diagnostic u/s were not covered even when ordered by my regular OBGYN.

All of the standard testing was done after 2 losses, my expanded RPL bloodwork, hysteroscopy (that was a fun one) and endometrial biopsy were done after the 3rd loss.

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ellisrena replied on 01-31-2011 3:52 PM | Locked

Steph- I agree with the other ladies.  With your family and personal history, it doesn't make sense to wait for another m/c to find out what's happening with you.  I also think, and granted I'm not a doctor, that with an early loss you could try again as sure as it is clear that your cycle has returned and regulated.  I waited until my period returned and then sat out that cycle.  I don't know in retrospect if I really needed to or not.  I was on clomid at the time of my m/c which I think contributed in my case.  I also agree with you that if you want some tests why wouldn't the doctor do them?  If nothing else it's more money for them.  Sorry you are going through this nonsense on top of everything else.

Susannah

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