Wow - I hadn't heard anything about J&J - does anyone have a link to read more about it? Britta - like you, I have annoyingly dry and sensitive skin - I'm guessing the baby might too - so it's good to read up on these things now.
http://www.cbsnews.com/8301-204_162-20128253/group-johnsons-baby-shampoo-a-cancer-risk/
here's a link to the story on CBS news.
Andronica, the J&J products sold in South Africa aren't the same formulations used in the United States, so those harmful chemicals aren't in the products sold there!
Protein C Deficiency (inherited blood clotting disorder) Diagnosed with Ulcerative Colitis May '03
http://tcoyf.com/members/chantpleure/charts/default.aspx
That's a relief - J&J is really popular in Australia too & I hadn't heard about harmful chemicals, so I'm hoping the formula's used here are also different from the States.
I've always felt reassured by the fact that they have been in business for SO LONG & have to meet all regulations, which (I know from being in the baby industry) are pretty tough in Australia. I had planned on using Aveeno (which I've heard good things about from friends).
RE: Hormones making us prickly pears.... I had an incident last night. DH spent a long time in Denial Town & has only recently boarded the train headed for Reality Town... Apparently the train hasn't left the station yet though..
He often jokes when asked by people "how do you feel about becoming a Dad?" that he already has a child (our dog), or says that he's going to build a shed to move into when the baby arrives (that always gets a laugh from me... at the pace he works, the shed will be ready when our child is 21!). Last night he had tried to go to bed early, but couldn't get to sleep (in his defense, he is very sleep deprived at the moment). When he got back up, I could feel some slight movement from the baby & told him I was going to see if I could get into a position to make it move a bit more, so he could feel it too. He said "I can already feel the baby move" (while giving the dog a belly rub). Usually I would just laugh & roll my eyes at him, but last night it was like waving a red flag at a bull! I bit his head off telling him he was about to be a Dad to a 2nd baby too & said I couldn't believe he had no interest in feeling his baby move... Luckily, he went back to bed & gave me time to cool off. When I went to bed a couple of hours later, I was still fuming, but by the light of day I had calmed down. We talked about it this morning & everything's fine. He assured me that joking around is his way of coping, that even though most of the time he feels worried about whether he'll be a good Dad & the pressures of being the only provider, that there are many things he's looking forward to as well (then he joked that he still didn't really believe we were married - and I rolled my eyes & laughed).
I feel a bit silly about it now & a bit guilty for giving him a hard time... Damned hormones!
Britta - I can also get quite touchy about 'advise' given my my MIL. I love her dearly, and I bite my tongue (because I know she means well), but I sometimes feel like screaming "DO YOU THINK I'M A COMPLETE IDIOT??!!". So I can relate to you feeling touchy about parenting techniques (especially since this isn't your first & you have done pretty well so far).
Amelia - I'm not sure pregnancy hormones are entirely to blame for you. I was always taught in management, that if you need to tell staff about something that needs improving, you should first enhance self esteem. This way, you get a much more positive response & the staff member works with you, instead of feeling resentful. So, for example, if your boss had said "Amelia, the children were working really well during their group work yesterday & I've always been very pleased with your class plans, but I did pick up on one thing that I feel can't be ignored... Your room was really in quite a state!" I'm sure you would have been much more receptive & would probably have agreed with her, then apologised & explained about the room, and without her having to say anything else, would have given her a commitment to rectify the problem.Sounds to me like your boss isn't a great manager! Keep your chin up - I always find it easier to deal with people like that once I've identified the chinks in their amour.
I'm off to Sydney tomorrow & not back until Tuesday night, so won't get a chance to check back in in awhile. Hope you all have a great week & I look forward to reading all your updates - I also can't believe we're almost in Tri 3 (the beginning was so SLOW & now it seems to be going past in a flash)!
Cheers,Bueller
PS:
Oops - Haven't heard from you yet this month. Is everything going well for you? Hopefully you get a chance for a quick pop in soon!
Andronica - Glad all is ok with your baby girl! (Funny how first we obsess about when we'll ever feel movement & then we move in to worrying about how often we feel it). Always best to get things checked out if they are out of the ordinary though!
Sorry for anyone I haven't addressed personally - I have a million things to do today before my trip - will try to be better with personals on my return!
If I'm remembering correctly from when I first read about the J&J stuff, one of the main reasons many people were angry was because they willingly changed their formulas in countries where they were legally required to do so (most of Europe, Australia, etc.) but they would not voluntarily change their formulas in countries where there was no legal requirement for them to change (like the US). So, in essence, they are aware that there are carcinogens in their products, but they're only removing them from the products in countries where they would be punished if they didn't. I recall reading that they were planning to remove the carcinogens from US products within a certain time frame...I feel like they said a couple of years which seems like a ridiculously long time when they could do it quickly in other countries.
I started using Cetaphil for myself when I was a teen, and it was the only thing that helped with my acne. It's really gentle and unscented, though it's definitely not organic or green in any way. It's gentle enough for babies, so I might consider using it once the baby is here. My sister in law loves the California Baby line of products. I like them, too, but they're pretty pricey. One of my friends recommended Episcencial brand (her son has severe allergies and she said this stuff doesn't irritate them at all), but I've never personally used any of them.
My Chart: http://tcoyf.com/members/zwizh413/charts/default.aspx
Natalie (25) married to Corby (29) since April 2009.
Off birth control since September 2010, charting since December 2010. Currently TTA while breastfeeding.
BFP on September 18 (10dpo)! Estimated date of delivery: June 1, 2012Laura Beatrice born naturally on May 25, 2012 after an intense 7.5 hour labor.
Chant - I'm so glad to hear that. I thought that might be the case though!
Bueller - Enjoy your trip!
Hey Ladies, I can’t believe this is the first chance this month I have had to sign in. Glad to hear things are going well for the most part and I can’t believe how quick the second tri is moving along!
I’ve been reading the comments about J&J products and I never had heard of the article. With DD, that was what we used. She had very sensitive skin and of course we were given a few different products as shower gifts but the J&J ones seemed to be the ones that didn’t give her a bumpy red rash so we stuck with them.
It’s been an interesting ride the last few weeks… Went for my app’t on February 9 and the doctor found the baby’s heartbeat to be irratic- ranging anywhere from 120-180 and she wasn’t happy with that so the next morning I was sent to the hospital for another full anatomy scan with extra attention paid to the cardiac area of the baby. Needless to say I didn’t sleep much that night waiting for the u/s. The u/s tech did everything and told me that I did not need to worry as she didn’t see anything wrong but it could have been just the baby’s position, the fact I was lying on my back for too long or even that I was sitting still for too long (my OB was 1.5 hours behind that day so I had a long wait for my app’t). She gave me good reassurance and then I went back to the OB on Tuesday (the 14th) and she felt all was well after she read the report and check the h/b with the doppler again. So, I don’t go back now until the 13th of March. When the OB read the report she also more or less confirmed that baby was a but DH doesn't know that as he still doesn't want to know. I'm excited about having 2 girls as I hear the bond of having a sister is amazing and it's something that I never got to know. But, there is a part of me that aches b/c this is our last and I'm not sure if DH will feel like he's missing out on something by not having a son. Also, when I was pg the first time my dad passed away when I was 6 weeks along and I would have loved a boy to name after my dad to carry on his memory in the family. Since my dad's death, I had my first DD, my SIL had a DD and now we are having another girl and this is it for babies in my family so this was the last chance to name a baby after my dad. That has caused some tears lately but I know his memory and love will always be with me no matter what. Started really feeling movement a lot more often, however not so much in the last couple of days. I’m trying not to worry but having already had one scare with the h/b it’s hard not too. I do have a cold now too which doesn’t help the situation and maybe this baby is just more docile than DD.
Second semester at school is going well- I have 3 pretty large classes so the marking will keep me busy but for the most part, the kids are well behaved. However, I have a colleague who has the same planning time as me and she just wants to “hang out” and chat when we’re off. I love her dearly and she is not married, nor does she have children so she doesn’t understand my constant need to use my time off for planning and marking as I cannot get these things done at home. How do I tell her I don’t have time for this without getting her upset????
Sorry, about my rant but it’s been a challenging month. I will try and be a better chat buddy over the next few months.
Thanks for the J&J info!
Sorry I'm MIA. I've been fighting a terrible cough for days now and DD seems to have not only that, but a fever to go with it.
I had another ultrasound appointment yesterday with the high risk doctors. Baby girl was still not cooperating for pictures, but they are hoping that last session and this session combined make a full set of pictures. Poor DH had to stay home with DD since we have no family nearby to watch a sick kid. And since baby girl was not cooperative, the tech couldn't even get DH some good pictures to look at. Also, there was a small concern about her heart. 3 techs and 2 doctors had split results as to whether there was a concern or not, so I'll go in next week to see a Pediatric Cardiologist for his opinion. DH said no matter what it takes, he'll be there for that ultrasound appointment so that we can deal with this together. Poor guy felt horrible that I had to discuss this alone and then drive over an hour home alone. But of course there was no way to know ahead of time what might happen since the first scan looked good.
DD 5/28/03
DS 1/24/06
DD 6/15/12
My Charts
Wow - lots of updates today! Apologies if I miss someone:
Leanne - glad the anatomy scan went well, and the concern abou the heartbeat doesn't seem to worry the OB too much - I hope you are doing okay not worrying either - sometimes I tell myself that if the baby can just make it to term, I won't worry any more, but I just don't think that's true. I'll probably always worry about her. As for naming a child after your dad - is there a way you can incorporate his name into the baby's name? Maybe as a middle name? Sorry you are having a challenging month - hope it starts going better.
Bueller - sorry about the tension with DH. I know my DH is a monster when he's sleep deprived, which worried me a little, bc I know we'll both be facing sleep deprivation soon. But, he's also a trooper, and he is excited about the baby, so he'll probably do okay. I think guys just aren't always good at expressing their emotions APPROPRIATELY. There's been a few times so far where DH has said something to me and I've burst into tears. Not that I'm above crying, but I seem to be more sensitive than usual. I do blame the hormones.
CRL - good luck at the Pediatric Cardiologist - your little girl sounds like a fighter (just like you) - I hope everything turns out okay and you can get some piece of mind. It's always frustrating when the experts can't agree with each other on sometime that's so important to you.
Sorry if I missed any updates! Things here are going well - I think the abdominal pains I was having before were mostly GI - my iron has been low and so DH was trying to boost it by putting a lot of Kale into my diet - I think I overdid it and had some insane bloating. I've cut back on it, and it seems to help. i've been feeling the little girl kick a lot lately - mostly when I am sitting still, or when I lie down at night. I've had a hard time getting comfortable at night - I get really hot, then I kick off the covers and freeze because I'm sweaty and the heater in our bedroom doesn't work. Also, my hips start to hurt sleeping on my side, then I turn over on my back in my sleep, and wake up bc my hands are asleep. And then I'm awake, so I have to pee, etc. I went to visit my parents for a week, which was great. DH came too - he went skiing for three days, which I was sad I couldn't do, but it didn't seem wise (also, it's a lot of money just to spend on the Bunny Slope all day). I feel like DH's life is going to change more than he thinks once the baby comes, so I want him to get out and have fun as much as he can.
So - I have a new question for everyone - especially those of you who already have kids. What are the important baby items to get? Are there things you feel like you couldn't do without? Are there things that you got that you never used, or things that are just a waste of space? We don't really have any baby items yet - although people are giving us things - I just don't know what to ask for. I know there are the obvious ones - crib, car seat, etc. Does anyone have thoughts on high chairs? We don't have a huge amount of space - I really don't want something huge and clunky. Share your thoughts! Also - does anyone have any thoughts on slings and carriers - or have any recommendations? Any thoughts on cloth vs disposable diapers?
Thanks - Happy Thursday everyone! Yesterday was an important anniversary for DH and I - 10 years ago (on 2/22/02), when DH and I were dating, we decided that day that we loved eachother and wanted to be together forever. Later that day, we got in a major car accident and walked away without a scratch. So, we always take a minute to remember 2/22 - the day we might have died together but didn't, and always feel a little grateful.
-Mags
Critter - Wow, what a day to remember! Sounds like you had a nice visit with family. I'd be bummed about not skiing too. I hear you on the sleep issues. It sounds a lot like what's happening here.
Our Important Items: car seat, stroller, baby carrier (we love Mei Tais because a lot of those commercial ones like the Bjorn are bad for baby's hips), diapers (we do disposables out of the house and cloth prefolds with a cover at home), bottles if you intend to use them, a good blanket to swaddle with, my kids loved a bouncy seat and swing but hated the crib. As for high chairs, we had a full sized one with the older kids that was bought for us. This time around my Mom bought a seat that hooks to our dining room chairs. It adjusts between an infant setting and a toddler setting. It's so much smaller and easier to move around.
Leanne - Glad that the final result was a good one for your little one's heart!
Bueller - I think we're all dealing with a lot more hormone craziness and tensions with DH. It seems to be there norm around this stage of pregnancy because it starts becoming real for DH as he sees that belly grow, feels the baby and sees the ultrasounds. But because it's all just starting to be real for them (unlike us who have been dealing with this for awhile), tensions fly high between the new mom and dad. Hang in there, I'm sure he'll adjust soon.
RE: the baby items; It's really all preference. We were given some things (like a wipes warmer) that I found needless and we didn't have space for it anyway, so I took it back. We have limited space and so we have the high chair that attaches to the dining room chair (or my sister attaches hers to a folding chair so they still have their comfy chairs for company) and it adjusts too between infant and toddler settings. We love it! DD sleeps in our room because we only have one room and for her we used a bassinet and then had a pack n' play (that she refused to sleep in, she preferred our bed) and now has a toddler bed at the end of our bed. I wish I had an arms reach co sleeper, though. And then a dresser from Ikea with a changing pad on top. We borrowed a bouncy chair and a swing from someone so we could give them back once she outgrew them. Oh and we have one of those hanging things in our closet that has 5-6 compartments where I keep/kept her towels, sheets, burp clothes, etc so as not to take up room in the dresser. We really like the Bumbo seat too! I had a wrap like a Moby, but different brand that can be used as a sling/front/back/side carrier and DD hated it. She preferred just the front pack for a short amount of time, but DD is also not the norm! We did strictly disposable diapers, but I have a ton of friends who used disposable just the first couple months and then use cloth! And obviously the infant carrier for the first year or so and we got the matching stroller and I liked that system. Now we have a toddler car seat and an umbrella type stroller. Both strollers just stay(ed) in my trunk of my car so I'd always have them with me.
Me (31) DH (31)
(5/24/09)
-(6/14/12)
Very early
http://tcoyf.com/members/britta/charts/default.aspx
Bueller, I'm joining the ranks with you and all the others who are experiencing tensions with DH! (Here comes me venting!) Corby is transitioning to a new position at work, so he's got a lot of stress right now. It's a good job move--more money, more in line with what he wants to be doing within the company--but he has a lot of anxiety related to changing jobs. He doesn't like confrontation and he hates to disappoint people, so having to talk with his current team about leaving them is really doing a number on him. He hardly ever gets angry, but when he's stressed, he can seem like he's angry even though he's not. So I feel like I'm having to walk on eggshells not to push his buttons. I think the work tension combined with new anxieties about the pregnancy/having a kid are just kind of overwhelming to him right now. I second whoever it was earlier who said that this is the stage in the pregnancy when the dads start feeling that it's really real.
The main way this is affecting me is that Corby is bringing up issues that I thought we had discussed and settled several weeks ago. The main one is when to call family to tell them I'm in labor. The birthing center we're using does not have a big family waiting area like a hospital would, and even if they did, I don't want to have 20 people waiting out there for me to give birth. I don't want to feel like I'm on a deadline or have an audience; I think that many people waiting could negatively impact how my labor progresses. With my family, if I call them and say, "I'm in labor! We'll keep you updated and call you when we're settled at home and ready for you to come visit." They would say, "Okay, sounds great!" With Corby's (giant) family, if we called and said the exact same thing, they would see it as a sign to head this way. Corby wants them to just wait at our house, but I don't want to be greeted by a giant crowd, and I don't want to feel like I'm having to host house guests after I've just had a baby. Ugh. Last night, Corby said, "Well, obviously we feel differently about this, and we'll need to find a way to compromise." By this point, I was exhausted, hormonal, and tired of talking about it, so I popped off and said, "Well, I'm the one pushing a baby out of my vagina, so I have to COMPROMISE LESS THAN YOU DO." Poor guy. It was not my best moment.
We still have plenty of time to figure things out, and I think once his stress levels have gone down, all this stuff won't seem like it's as big of a deal. But right now it's very frustrating! lol
hi ladies! Sorry i've been gone so long. I've been reading all the posts and dying to jump in but didn't have very good internet where i was. This is also a quick pop in so forgive me for skipping personals - i'll try to get them later.
Baby & I are doing well. my belly is starting to resemble a jiffy-pop bag! so much fun to see the bumps and pops!so far haven't had any unpleasant symptoms like heartburn or hemorrhoids (knock on wood)
we just got back from our trip. it was a lovely baby moon and since i couldn't go diving (as per the intention of the trip), i hung out & read or visited the spa while DH dove with sharks and saw dolphins. the getting there & back was very long and uncomfortable (27 hrs there and 35 back), but i was a trooper... despite the guy behind me puking then knocking his head into my seat or the old lady that pulled my hair! ha ha. and i threaten to cry on a United Airlines agent when he was giving me grief saying my luggage was a pound over.
a quick weigh-in on the products. there is a great website that i refer too to learn about what ingredients are in things - if anyone is interested it is: http://www.ewg.org/skindeep/i plan on using stuff from a company called Rocky Mountain Soap Company. they use nothing but natural ingredients and they have a line for babies. I use a bunch of their stuff already and LOVE it (no parabens, thalates, salicides, etc.)
and I love your question Critter to the experienced moms about items they love - would this be helpful in a separate thread? just thinking to make it easier to reference?
OK - more soon, i promise. I'm glad to hear you're all doing so well and the recent scares have been followed with reassurances. Stay healthy my friends. we're sneaking up on 6 months!! can you believe it??V
Hi Natalie,
Just wanted to reply directly to your issue with your DH and the birth/crowd/guests thing.
I had this EXACT same thing going on before DD's birth. My fam I can say "I will tell you when," whereas his tells him when they are coming, and he refuses to assert himself and say no. I brought it up early in the pregnancy because I knew it would be an issue, and I wanted to have assurances early on that I would not be hosting his family right after giving birth, because they are not easy guests (my Mum will do laundry, rock the baby, make meals, do dishes, she WORKS when she's here - whereas his Mum, I THINK because she doesn't want to step on my toes, but it wouldn't be, and I'm totally giving her the benefit of the doubt - sits and just wants to visit. Don't get me wrong, I love my in-laws, but I need to be READY for their visits - not recovering from a birth and dealing with issues like stitches, breast engorgement, sleeplessness, and all the things that do not allow for the hostess in me to shine - c'mon, I needed help walking to the toilet and lowering myself after DD's birth - there are only two people who I will allow to do that - my mum and my DH!!! NOT my MIL. SO.....all this crazy rant to say, you DO have more of a right than your DH to decide who comes and goes, because the birth is your body, you are the one who has to recover from it, and feeling comfortable while you are giving birth gives you greater chances of doing less damage 'down there' through your pushing (if you are pushing without meds and can feel, of course) :)
I am so sensitive to this issue. I was really upset for so long that my DH would not just tell his parents that we would tell them when to come (they live a 7 hour drive away, and the idea of staying in a hotel....well, they'd be more likely to sleep in our back yard in the rain than pay for a hotel room). In the end, they came 3 weeks after the birth, (called every day to see if it was ok yet (awkward)) and four people stayed in our tiny place for four nights. It was fine.
My DH changed his tune IMMEDIATELY after he saw me give birth - I think he was stunned by how hard I worked and what it took physically, and of course our beautiful daughter being a physical reality in his arms, and then by how much physical trauma I had - he kept saying - let's let Shannon get back on her feet a bit more before you come - but it would have been SOO nice to have had that support BEFORE the birth. It was very stressful for me imagining them being on our doorstep the day after the birth suitcases in hand. And it was kind of uncomfortable sitting on ice packs and learning how to nurse with my father in law in my house (our house is a very small rowhouse) even three weeks in, but I guess at that point I started to think about how I was helping her to have good relationships with them, I will be able to show her the pictures of their visit and tell her how they came all the way to see her when she was a tiny new baby, and how excited they were to meet her. That's pretty special, and I do know it's great to have grandparents who are so smitten as they are.
I think this is a hot button issue for a lot of couples. You are not alone in worrying about this. This time, I have laid down the law: I told DH his parents can come any time after my Mum leaves (2-3 weeks), but no siblings until I am TOTALLY ready (in other words, months, not weeks). He was cool with that this time. Or maybe just didn't feel like hashing it out anymore :)
OK signing off - this was meant to be a supportive post to you - and turned out to be more of my own rant. May I blame the hormones??? :)
me: 29 DH: 29
April 2010, BF'd for 15 months
Expected June 25,2012!!
Natalie - Sorry you and DH aren't in agreement about after birth visits. I can tell you that you are certainly right not wanting to have visitors staying at your house. I understand your hubby wants to share his joy with his family, but he must understand that giving birth isn't a walk in the park for a lot of people. I would suggest that you find a way to show him or make him understand what a birth entails. I know my hubby had no idea what about to happen, so his brother ended up at our house an hour after I came home from the hospital. To say that I was upset is an understatement. But the damage had already been done since he agreed to it before he saw the birth process. Your best defense is to stand your ground and try to help him understand that you your not being mean to his family, but that you physically won't be able to have extra people around. Remember to validate his feelings and wishes and not to steam roll over them. Things like "I understand you want XYZ". But then he needs to be able to respect your needs too. My hubby is now my biggest supporter and kicked his Mom out when I came home from a recent surgery. He knew that having her here was going to be more work and stress for him, so it was easier to have his Mom mad for a few weeks than to have me be mad at him.
Good luck!
Natalie- I can tell you from my experience to stick to your guns on this one! My family was very understanding when I did not want anyone at the hospital and asked them to give DH and I a week to ourselves with the new baby before they flew up to stay with us. Many people were shocked that we had just moved out of state for DH's job and knew no one, but we managed just fine because DH had a week leave from work, and we had food in the freezer, and DH ran to the store if necessary. I cherished the quiet time we had together where I didn't have to "be" anything for anyone.
However, DH's parents were offended that they couldn't hop on the first plane and see the birth, and stay with us right away. In fact, I invited my Mom and Sister to come visit and stay first and they were offended that they couldn't come and stay at the same time. I explained to them that I didn't want that many people to be staying with us at once, it would be too chaotic for me. I also said that I wanted to spend the time with JUST my Mom and Sister since I don't see them often. They could care less about my honest reasons....thankfully DH supported my decision even though he was anxious for his parents to come too.
In the end.....you are right! You are the one that has to do an enormous amount of work physically and emotionally. You cannot imagine the feelings that flood you after giving birth...and you need to be comfortable at all costs, whatever that means to you. Your comfort and the babies comfort come first....period.
Me-32 * DH-32 * 2 Furbabies
WOW! I love it that everyone is posting!!
First, as for baby products -- I am a minimalist. It's funny that you should bring this up because I was walking through the baby department at Walmart thinking about how overpriced and unnecessary 80% of the stuff is -- at least for us! I've never had a high chair -- I spent $16 on a sturdy plastic chair that attaches to a regular dining room chair and it's lasted through two children -- and I'll be using it with my third! I never got a crib -- I used a Pack n Play meaning to get a crib and never got around to it since it worked just fine. I always had a paranoia with a crib that the baby would get caught in the slats or by the mattress. I borrowed a bassinette from a friend, but really you can get a Moses basket and use that, or even just a portable bassinette. The Pack N Play usually comes with a bassinette but I didn't like it very much. To be perfectly honest, when I had my first, I got a plastic under-the-bed container, put a pad at the bottom, rolled up a few blankets on the side, and let her sleep in that (only if I was awake and watching her, of course) -- then I could just pick her up and carry her around from room to room without disturbing her sleep. I'm sort of unconventional, though.
I LOVED my sling (I used a handmade one with my first and a Maya wrap with my second) and HATED and NEVER USED the front carrier. It killed my back and I could never get comfortable with it. Another indispensible thing would have been my travel system. I got a SnugRide with a stroller, and it was a lifesaver. It is horrible having to try to transfer a sleeping baby from the car inside or vice versa. The Snugride avoids all that, and you can transfer with ease without the disabling fear that your baby will wake up crying (believe me, when you're sleep deprived and the sound of crying is like an ice pick in your ears, it really feels like your life depends on not waking that baby up!).
The last indispensible thing would be a swaddler. Not ALL babies love being swaddled, but it really helped both of mine. I bought one called the Woombie (you can look it up on line) and I'll be buying one again this time around -- maybe along with some good basic stretchable blankets because a tight swaddle is what a lot of babies do best with.
I used disposable diapers because I remembered having cloth diapers when I was little (swear it!) and I didn't like the way they felt. I remember the hassle my mom had trying to keep them clean, and I figured I was trading off -- I breastfed exclusively and that, although it was important to me -- was a massive hassle for a working mom. I couldn't add the massive hassle of cloth diapers, and my child care provider would only do disposable.
AS FOR THE birth situation - don't give an inch IMHO. For any of you who have a balking hubby, ask him if he thinks he would feel like entertaining right after he pushed out a BM the size of a bowling ball, along with a nice tear, and with a chest that felt rubbed raw by sandpaper, with only about three hours of sleep a night. PLEASE don't allow anyone who will be more work for you. It is simply too much to ask, and it'll interfere with the energy you have to love on your new person.
More than likely, the hubbies who are trying to get the okay from you for family to come immediately are trying to pacify the female members of the family who feel that somehow it is their "right" to be there. This is time for your man to grab his maleness and stand up for what you want -- whatever that is. Right when baby comes is not the time to be trying to suppress your resentment towards your in-laws -- the way your hormones are those first couple of weeks, you may say or do some things that might be -- well, not very nice. It's just not the time to try to make everyone happy!
Mom to three beautiful girls, 7, 3, and 3 months :)
Four sweet angel babies: ectopic pregnancy, 3/08; missed miscarriage at 10 weeks, 11/10; chemical pregnancy/early loss, 3/11; miscarriage at 5 weeks, 5/1; new baby -- yeah!!
Mags - After asking around I've come to realize that baby necessities are unique to each individual/family. So you will need to figure out what will work for you. many of the big things depend on space and lifestyle. There is a thread on the forums that might help answer your questions so you might want to look at that as well.
Hey! I would really appreciate any prayers, good thoughts, etc right now. We found out today that our DD, who is 2.5 yrs old, has a large mass on her left adrenal gland. It's super rare and the chance of it being cancerous is quite high at this point. We are seeing an endocrinologist and hematologist tomorrow and she also is going to have a CT scan to get a closer look at this mass and check for any other masses. We are so scared, but trying to trust the Lord is in control. I am also worried that all of this stress is going to negatively affect my little boy in the womb! This is every parents worst nightmare!
If anyone has any encouraging stories, or any experience positive or negative with this type of issue, I'd appreciate it!
Thank you so much,
Britta
Britta - Sorry to hear about his development with your DD. While I don't have any personal experience with this situation, I can understand the thoughts and feelings you might be having after hearing the word cancer. All I can say is that prayer works wonders. My kids learned over the last year that prayer for the cancer patient (me) and for the doctors wisdom produces miraculous results. The doctors at a large cancer facility I had surgery through were amazed by my story and there is no one but God to give the credit to. I also understand the feelings of concern for your little one as we are dealing with some scary heart issues right now. I know it may not seem like it, but you are right that the Lord is in control and has a plan that we sometimes can't understand. I'll keep your family in our prayers.